Do Holidays Differently

06 Nov

Joffre McClung Holidays, Self-love 0 0

We are now entering the holiday season for many of us. Perhaps it is time to do holidays differently since they consistently do two things.

They stress out – with all the planning, shopping, cooking, traveling, and trying to keep everyone happy, which is frankly impossible, yet we try. They stress us out.
We allow people to step over our boundaries. I don’t care how strong you are – you will end up doing something you really don’t want to do just to keep the peace or, even worse, look good in other people’s eyes.

Don’t like to cook

We are only going to do the things that we truly want to do. Perhaps you don’t like cooking – go out to eat or have everyone bring a dish to the event. Trying to create a special dinner that you are too tired to enjoy is crazy. One of the best Christmas meals my folks and I had was when we went to the Plaza Hotel for Christmas dinner. I was living in NYC in a studio, so we had to eat out. It was charming and delicious, and no one was too tired to enjoy the meal. Do holidays differently. We did and loved it.

Don’t want to spend money

Maybe you are stressed about spending money – make personal gifts. I did this for a close friend whose birthday is just before Christmas day. He had just hit a big birthday, and I was low on money and determined not to spend too much. So I bought a frame with eight picture slots, and I went through all the images I had taken over the decades. I chose the happiest photos of all of us together and sent it to him. He loved it because he said it was sitting on his desk now. I did holidays differently.

Not good with boundaries

All I can say is if you are doing something to look good in other people’s eyes – you may have some inner work to do, and honestly, you may need to boost your sense of self-love a lot. And as for keeping the peace, all I can say about that is I lived that way for way too long. It may feel like you are doing something good, but in truth, you are hurting yourself. Part of self-love is respecting yourself; sometimes, respecting yourself means walking away or not participating. Let’s all do holidays differently. We deserve nothing less.