Stop talking and instead practice
This week’s inspiration is forgiveness. We all are taught about forgiveness, but so few of us actually practice it. Unfortunately, we now live in a “cancel culture” where you need to be canceled if you did something wrong 10 minutes ago or ten years ago. However, I do see the difference between 10 minutes ago and ten years ago. Hopefully, you have grown and changed in the last ten years, and so has the person.
Why we withhold forgiveness
I believe we withhold forgiveness for others because we have not learned to forgive ourselves. You cannot offer something to someone that you do not provide yourself as well. We don’t forgive others because we don’t know how to forgive ourselves in truth. It is because we lack self-love.
Forgiveness is about Compassionate Understanding
I found forgiveness for my bad behavior born out of my lack of self-love. I remembered what I felt and thought when I did the bad behavior. I felt what I felt at the time. I also looked at my inner orphans – those stuck in the past because of fear and pain and what it made me do. Remembering what I thought at the time brought up the “understanding” of why I did it. And feeling what I felt at the time, brought up compassion for myself and the pain I was in when it happened.
Forgiveness starts with you
When I learned about compassionate understanding, I offered it to myself and all the bad behavior born out of my lack of self-love. Once I did this, I suddenly found it so much easier to offer forgiveness to others because I now understood the pain they must be feeling to make them act badly. We all do bad things, but that does not mean we are bad people. Forgiveness frees us and allows us to grow. Offer forgiveness to yourself first.
For more on self-love, check out my books The Heart Of The Matter and How Learning To Say Goodbye Taught Me How To Live.
Until next time, be the light the world needs and have a love for all.